Perpetual rebellion

Evolution/Pollution

2007-10-02T04:50:00.000+02:00

The world goes round and round
While I stand still
Nothing seems to change
Even if there is the will.

The will to move forward
The will to evolve
But that leaves me the question;
How can this be solved?

There are no answers,
There is no solution.
I'll always be stuck
In this mind full of pollution.

Peace Of Mind

2007-09-20T03:26:00.001+02:00

The world keeps changing
as days go by
things keep re-arranging
when all I want is to fly.

Fly away from here
to a place where everyone's kind
or better: where no-one's there
so I can finally have some peace of mind.

Coat Of Happiness

2007-09-20T03:24:00.000+02:00

The trees
alongside the road
dancing with the wind
but the wind won't blow off my coat.

A coat
shiny and new
no stains or holes
it never was where its owner flew.

I can't lose it
have to keep it on
'cause if I take it off
they'll have won.

Forgiveness

2007-03-17T23:12:00.000+01:00

Look at that girl,
falling on her knees,
asking for forgiveness.
She doesn't need
a slap in her face,
she's already down low.

Look at that girl
fallen on her face,
as she asked for forgiveness.
She had it coming
a smack in her face
balancing on the edge.

She looks up
with her broken heart
asking once more.
She knows it,
she doesn't deserve it,
But it's the only hope she's got left.

Thank You

2007-03-02T20:33:00.000+01:00

Ripped
into pieces.
Torn
apart.

Abandoned
to fade.
Left
behind.

Angry
is what I am.
Rage
is what I feel.

I'm sorry,
you sealed my deal.

Curtain Falls

2007-02-20T03:55:00.000+01:00

the curtain will fall
soon
the darkness
will surround me

taking me along
away from here
I'm bleeding
I don't care

[Inspired by the band 'Riverside' from Poland]

You Win

2007-02-20T01:53:00.000+01:00

Everyday I've been fighting
for your attention
Never got it
no matter what I mentioned

Whatever I did
was never good enough
Whatever I said
there was no love

All this time
I've been trying so hard
But you didn't respond
not even a card

Now I've reached the point
I'm through my skin
Daddy,
You win.

cruelty

2007-01-24T23:54:00.001+01:00

pain
brutal pain
without meaning to

hurt
immense hurt
without wanting to

why
is humanity
so ******* cruel?

Conquerer

2007-01-21T23:48:00.000+01:00

There you go
drifting away
again.

Not giving me
the chance
to make it up to you.

I know you don't want this
you just want to be loved
instead of hurt.

Why don't you trust me then
why don't you give me a chance
I'll prove it to you;

I'll prove you wrong
I'll prove you that
love can conquer everything.

Can't Tell

2007-01-07T22:55:00.000+01:00

I can't tell
how I feel
I can't tell
what I see

I can't say
what I want
I can't say
what'll happen

I can't speak
about her
I can't speak
about anything

I can't think of anything
other than the words
I've already used too often;
I'm sorry

Changes

2006-12-07T02:05:00.000+01:00

I'm not the perfect daughter
Far from it
And I don't always make it easy
For you to settle in

But don't you go around
blaming me for all that's wrong
'Cause I'm not the only one
who doesn't try hard enough

No, you're not perfect either
And I know you never wanted this
And you didn't expect it either
But now we're here

So, for god's sake, just try
Try being a mother
Try accepting me the way I am
Please show me more affection

'Cause I wanna love you
I really do
But if we both don't change
I'll never be that loving girl
That you want me to be
Instead of this resentful, aggressive girl
That I am

Nobody

2006-12-07T02:03:00.000+01:00

Nobody
Seems to really care
How much longer
She can bare.

Nobody knows
How she's lost hope
And how she's
Struggling to cope.

Nobody sees
The damage she's done
To herself
Waiting to be gone.

Nobody hears
Her crying at night
Praying
To finally reach the Light.

The Island

2006-11-03T18:19:00.001+01:00

all quiet and peacefull
reunited
all loved and cared for
reaching out

the Island
where she can be
whomever she wants to be
the Island

all ready to go
done
all things settled
time has come...

Dungeon Funeral

2006-11-03T03:20:00.000+01:00

a dungeon dark and still
there she is, feeling ill
wanting to scream and cry
yet everyone passes by

going away
leaving her without any hope
why cant they stay
she cannot cope...

I'm not over you

2006-10-04T08:56:00.000+02:00

Time goes by
and I try
to move on
but I can't.

It hurts so bad
and I'm so fuckin' sad
and angry
all at once.

I can't do this anymore
wanna walk out the door
make it stop
it hurts, I'm out...

Together

2006-09-06T23:06:00.000+02:00

Together we could've
made it through
Together we could've
still have her

Why didn't you involve me?
Let me into your life.
I can't imagine how hard it must be
to lose your wife.

Wish I would've been older
and could've remembered it.
Wish I was stronger
so I could take your pain.

Together we can make it
Together we are a team
Together we're invincible
Together we can dream.

Finished

2006-09-06T23:04:00.000+02:00

The curly hair
I can feel it
But yet I don't

Wishing it wouldn't
Be this hard
But it won't help

No matter what
I say
No matter how hard
I pray

She's gone
Won't come back

Don't bother

2006-09-02T19:53:00.000+02:00

Let me go
Dont bother
I dont wanna know.
Dont tell me you love me
It makes this even more painful
Stop it
please
Dont care
Let me be
I'm outa here

Train

2006-08-28T11:36:00.000+02:00

You are gone,
will never come back.
No matter how ard
I wish or pray.
It's over.

I am here,
at this trainstation.
Have to choose
what train I'll enter.
Where should I go?

Both trains
got pro's and cons.
Still can't pick.
Too late, they're leaving.
And I'm stuck here.

Stuck between life and death,
Them and you.
Guess I'm bound
to stay forever.
No more of them, nor you.
Just me,
alone forever.

Like a clock

2006-08-28T11:34:00.000+02:00

The clock
is ticking
tick, tack, tick, tack...
I'm looking at it
how the hands slide
towards the next hour.
Still no change.

The door underneath opens
my eyes stare at it
hoping it's him.
But it's just her.

My eyes slide back to the clock
The hourhand is still moving.
And it won't stop
untill the battery goes dead.
Just like my heart
stops beating
untill he will come
to change the batteries.

Distant love

2006-08-23T21:07:00.000+02:00

Time goes by
so quickly
and there's nothing
I can do

Time goes by
so quickly
when all I want
is to be with you

The distance
is so big
it's tearing
me apart

The distance
is so big
I'll keep you forever
in my heart

Some friend

2006-08-23T21:04:00.000+02:00

energy
money
passion
love
I gave
everything
but you just took it
leaving me
shattered
drained
empty
and alone

Wrong impression

2006-08-18T19:45:00.000+02:00

Always thought
you were the one
who cared

Always thought
you were the one
who loved me most

Always felt
he was the one
who wasn't interested

Always felt
he was the one
who didn't listen

But today I found
it's the other way around
Why didn't I see this coming?
I'm not your daughter
so why would you want me here?
After all, it's not as if you care...

Mirror

2006-08-16T15:20:00.000+02:00

Unpredictable,
the things you say
but yet, I hear.

Secrets,
in your head
but yet, I sense.

Hiding,
your feelings inside
but yet, I know.

Pain,
under your sleeves
but yet, I see.

But when I look into the mirror
I dont hear or sense,
nor do I know or see.
It's empty.
And you're the only one
who can show me
who I really am.

Your fault

2006-08-16T15:10:00.000+02:00

You never knew
what was going on
inside my head

You never knew
what I thought
when laying in bed

I tried to tell you
what was going on
what my life was about

I tried to tell you
but you didn't care
you just walked out

Now you're blaming me
for the things you did
and for feeling hate

Now you're blaming me
for being a stranger
and for the mistakes you made!

Insanity

2006-08-10T16:50:00.000+02:00

People kill eachother
and go insane.
Governments fraude
and act weird.

This world is going crazy.
But yet
we call it
normality...??

Home

2006-08-09T16:09:00.000+02:00

Somewhere
far away
is where you are.
Waiting
for me
to come visit you.
I will
when time has come.
When te world is ready
to set me loose.
That´s when I´ll leave
and float towards you.
I´ll be coming home.
Please let me in.

Wake up

2006-08-06T17:27:00.000+02:00

Is this a dream?
It must be.
What else could explain
your stunning appearance
sweet words
shy smile.
I must be dreaming.
How else could I explain
the way you treat me,
the things you say to me.
Only in dreams
am I loveable
worthwhile.

Then there's pain.
Someone touches me.
It's you.
The slap in my face
brings me back to reality.
Where I love you
and you can't love me.

Like a bird

2006-08-02T16:13:00.000+02:00

As time passes
birds keep on flying
but she stands still
looking back
watching her life
as a movie.

The monsters coming
and leaving her behind
shattered and alone
damaged for life.
Nobody believes her;
"Monsters don't exist"
But she knows better.

She'll never forget.
And maybe one day
they'll believe her.
But it's too late.

Again she sees a bird
flying past her.
She takes off
and flies along
into the quiet night.

Rolemodel

2006-07-30T18:03:00.003+02:00

Worthless,
reckless,
irresponsible.
All put in words
very well.
Thank you for telling me
what a failure I am.
But please don't forget,
I learned it all
from YOU!

Sharif

2006-07-30T18:03:00.002+02:00

You said it was cause you had to go
that it was what you had to do
You said it was best for both
I don't believe you

Though you always were careful
and stopped when I told you to
I felt you wanted more
Sorry I couldn't give it to you

Now you left me wondering
why did we end?
I know it's not the reason you said
but why then??

Passing

2006-07-30T18:03:00.001+02:00

tears
streaming
down her face
arms
embracing
saying she's ace

drops
dripping
on the floor
hands
guide
her to the door

fingers
stroking
through her hair
but yet
life
passes

it's unfair

Gone

2006-07-30T18:03:00.000+02:00

There she is
She's put on her smile
Has to keep it there
For quite a while

Afraid of what
Others might see
When she lets it down
Will they flee?

Well even if they stay
She wont know
'Cause she made her plans
She will go

Silently

2006-07-30T18:02:00.000+02:00

silently whispering
hoping they won't hear
but yet she wants them to
she wants them to care

silently hiding
hoping they won't see
but yet she misses them
wants them to see

silently hoping
for them to be nice
when they get back
instead of cold as ice

silently wishing
they wouldn't exist
but yet, without them
she couldn't live

Flee

2006-07-30T17:56:00.000+02:00

There she goes
running along the river
moving away
from me.

There she went
to flee from this
into something else
with prospect.

Was there anything
I could've done
to make her stay
rather than go away?

No, this was meant to be
She had to run from me
Cos she has to follow her own path
towards happiness

To be happy
she had to flee
away
from me.

Too much to ask

2006-07-30T17:55:00.001+02:00

Am I asking too much of you?
Am I really too hard on you?
Or is it you?
Are you giving too little?

Why do you always make me wonder
If it's my own fault?
Is life supposed to be this hard?

Can't you see I wouldn't be like this
If you'd give me what I need?
Is it really too much to ask,
to get some affection?

See yourself

2006-07-30T17:55:00.000+02:00

If you could only see
your beauty
the way I see it

If you could only hear
your voice
the way I hear it

If you could only feel
your love
the way I feel it

If you could only care
about yourself
the way i care about you

If you could only love
yourself
the way I love you

You'd be
the most loved
and happy person
on earth

Alive

2006-07-30T17:54:00.000+02:00

Your eyes
they make me see
a world of love

Your lips
they make me float
to the clouds above

Your lovely words
they make me feel
worthwhile

You're the one
who keeps me
alive!

Me

2006-07-30T17:53:00.002+02:00

Why
Do you know me
Better
Than I know myself?

How
Can you love me
More
Than I love myself?

When
Will you stop making me feel
As if
You've got a wrong image of me?

Why
Do you care for me
When all I deserve
Is to be hated?!

Over

2006-07-30T17:53:00.001+02:00

Torn
Into pieces
Ripped apart
Nowhere to find.
Lost
In space
Forgotten
Left to fade away.
Alone
In my mind
Drowning
In my thoughts.
Forever
There will be
No more
Left
Of me

Fade

2006-07-30T17:53:00.000+02:00

Tears
they trickle
down my cheeks.
Drops
falling down
off my chin.
Dripping on the floor
squashed
into pieces.
Broken as
my shattered soul;
Left alone
to fade
into dust...

Reason

2006-07-30T17:52:00.001+02:00

There she is
floating between us.
Hoping we'll see
What love is.

She left you
as well as me
Maybe we can try to think
This was meant to be.

Sometimes
I think you blame me
And sometimes
I blame you.

But fact is
it's no-ones fault
And we should go on
Instead of thinking back

We should start to do
what she'd want us to do:
show eachother
How much we care
About one another

Daddy, I love you

Hate me

2006-07-30T17:52:00.000+02:00

get the f*ck out
out of my heart
out of my life
out of my mind

please just start feeling
feeling love for yourself
feeling regrets for knowing me
feeling hate for me

leave
walk out on me
and hate me
for the rest of your life
I promise you
that's the best for all...

Ghost

2006-07-30T17:51:00.001+02:00

it's time
to leave
cos there's nothing
left no more
to be happy for
nothing
left
to stay for
please don't
love me no more
I'm not worth it
just walk
out that door
and never
ever
look back
cos I won't
be there no more
at the doorstep
there'll be
nothing but a shadow
waving goodbye
to you all

Why can't you see?

2006-07-30T17:51:00.000+02:00

You have absolutely no clue
of what I'm going through
Every day is hell for me
And you just can't see

You don't see how much I need you
You don't see what I need you to do
I just need you to be here
I want you to be near

Why are you always away
This has to stop today
I need more than your body near
I need your soul to be here!!!

I love you,
why can't you just love me too?

Wonders

2006-07-30T17:50:00.000+02:00

The wonders haven't left yet
They are still here
Within the people you've met
And the stories you share

And even if they're far away
Never give up the hope
Cos in your heart they'll stay
And they'll help you cope

With your biggest loss
And your greatest fear
Through the deepest valleys
And the highest tops
They will always be near!

Sorry

2006-07-30T17:49:00.002+02:00

For as long as I remember
I thought I hated you
But I was wrong
I realise now
I just feel sorry for you

Sorry for the loss of your beloved
Sorry for your unability to show your love
Sorry for having to deal with disappointment
But most of all I'm sorry for you
that you are YOU...

Paternal love

2006-07-30T17:49:00.001+02:00

Why are you here
If you don't love me anyway
Why do you do this
If you can't ever be proud at me

Why do you say those things
That make me feel worthless
Why do you do those things
That make me feel wrong

Why do you keep on rubbing in
That she's better than me
Why do you show so obvious
That you love her more than me

Why can't you just be
Proud of me
For who I am and what I do
Why can't you just love me
The way it should be
As fathers are supposed to

Regrets

2006-07-30T17:49:00.000+02:00

My body may be gone,
But I'm still here;
My spirit lives on.

And you'll feel in your soul
That I am here,
To fill up the hole.

But not entirely.
Therefore it's too much;
The pain you caused me.

And every night in bed,
You'll think of me
And wish you'd have said

That you DID believe.
But now it's too late;
And you'll have to live in grief...

Scars

2006-07-30T17:48:00.000+02:00

Scars
On my body
But they will fade
Or even disappear

Scars
In my soul
Brought to by strangers
But also by friends

These scars
Will never fade
They will never stop hurting
They'll grow deeper
As time goes by...

Our world

2006-07-30T17:47:00.000+02:00

I'm surrounded by love
All these people who care
But still sometimes
I don't wanna be here

I really wanna be with you
Not just read your letters.
I wanna be part of your life,
Where you and me is all that matters.

I wanna fly away
Towards your world
Then maybe
We can turn it into our world.

Our world
Where we can be
Our world
For eternity...

Time

2006-07-30T17:46:00.001+02:00

Every day
I act happy as I should be
Every night
I'm crying over this fake me

Every morning
I wonder why I'm here
Ever evening
I wish I could be there

Every second
I think of you
Every moment
I wonder what I gotta do without you

Now I realise
It's nothing I have done
It's just that
Your time had come

untitled

2006-07-30T17:46:00.000+02:00

Sometimes you want to forget the world,
Act as if you're alone.
You think you've created this world,
In which you are free.
And although earth keeps revolving,
While you don't want her to;
I am there for you,
Wherever you are or will be going to.

The end

2006-07-30T17:43:00.000+02:00

The end is near.
I can feel it,
Salvation is almost there.
It's only a matter of days,
Before I'm released
In so many ways.
Open your heart,
And keep me there.
That way I'll always be here...